I laughed and was actually a little freaked out when Pinterest recently suggested exercises for losing my muffin top. How did it know? The truth is, I havebeen Googling ways to lose unwanted fat. It’s been two years since I had my third baby, and in spite of being on a very restricted low-carb no-sugar diet for health reasons, I still haven’t lost all the baby weight.
After my second baby, diastasis recti left my stomach muscles weak and distended (so sexy, I know). When I see the rolls around my waist, thighs, and chin, I feel like my six-year-old self all over again: sobbing because she wanted to be beautiful on the outside, not just the inside.
Pregnancy wrecks the body in more ways than one. Insecurities can flood our hearts as we deal with the aftermath of birth.
A while back I had to finally deal with my insecurities instead of ignoring them. They had been more like white noise after my third child was born—not always disrupting my life but always present when I looked in the mirror or compared myself to other postpartum friends. When I felt shame or just plain sadness, I hoped that at some point it wouldn’t be like this forever. Eventually I’d go back to pre-pregnancy weight, right? But the months rolled on and there wasn’t much progress. What comfort did I have?
Mama, can you relate? Have you, like me, grown used to looking at the mirror and feeling disappointment and sadness? Is there hope and help for us in this frustration with our postpartum bodies? Should we even care about physical appearance? What areour bodies for?
The Christmas season is a celebration of the incarnation: the truth that Jesus, who was fully God, also became fully human, a man of flesh and blood. This truth has a lot to say to postpartum mamas wrestling with questions, because when Christ entered time he became like us; he received a body exactly like ours.
He was the beautiful King promised by the prophets but his beauty was not what we expected (Is. 33:17). He exchanged the dazzling glory of heaven for dusty humanity. Isaiah tells us that there was nothing about his appearance that would make him desirable, something I can certainly identify with in this body after babies (Is. 53:2).
In that body Jesus lived the righteous life we needed. His hands touched with compassion those in need, his feet moved to share the good news of the Kingdom, and his eyes cried over the brokenness of this world.
Christ’s body was prepared for him by his Father with one purpose, and one purpose only: obedience to the Father's will (Heb. 10:5). Christ would offer his body up in obedience even unto death. Like a mother laboring in anguish to birth her child, Christ labored for his children—you and me—out of the anguish of his own soul. A glorious, shocking exchange happened through that body. Bloody and disfigured, Christ took upon himself all the ugliness of our sin and shame, and the guilt of our sinful flesh, giving us his holiness and honor.
Butthe story of his body didn’t stop there, as humbling as it is. His body, which ceased to breathe, was resurrected from the dead. And even in his glorified state, he still had scars (Luke 24:39). Rather than taking away from Christ’s beauty, the scars on his glorified body reveal it. They show his mercy and obedience, and his unfathomable love for us. Christ ascended to the presence of the Father in that body and is there now, praying for us (Heb. 7:25).
And now, we anticipate Jesus’ return in his perfectly resurrected body, when he will give us glorified bodies as well—bodies that will never be subject to decay. And while we wait, though outwardly we are wasting away, he has given us his Holy Spirit who enables us to live lives that please our Father. Christ’s Spirit, the same Spirit that raised him from the dead, has taken up residence within our own mortal, imperfect bodies, living Christ’s perfect life through us by faith (Gal. 2:20; Rom. 8). Jesus’ life is ours—completely.
So now, mama, by the power of his Spirit, we too can present our bodies as living sacrifices (Rom. 12:1-2), saying, “Father, you have prepared for me thisbody. I offer it up to do your will.” Maybe all you see in the mirror are stretch marks, thick C-section scar tissue, belly fat, unflattering bulges, and unwanted rolls. Even if you didn’t birth your baby physically, perhaps you see the effects of less personal time for the gym and food preparation in weight gain, or the wrinkles of laugh lines, or the under-eye bags from sleepless nights. But there is something the mirror can’t tell you. Those marks and changes are reflections of Christ’s unseen beauty in you. You too have sacrificially given yourself so others can live.
By faith in all he is through us, we continue to offer up our bodies not only for our biological children but our spiritual ones as well. We know more of Christ as we use our bodies for his service, using our hands to care for the least of these, our mouths to speak with kindness, and our feet to share the gospel of peace.
We steward our bodies, work out, eat healthily, and dress ourselves to please our spouses. And yet we don't do any of it to keep or display the glory of our bodies, but to offer them up. This is how we love others well for the glory of our resurrected Savior. He enables us to see our bodies as he did: a gift to give away, not to be preserved. This, mama, is true beauty.
As you dress for holiday parties, services, and events this season, catching glimpses of your changed body in the mirror, don’t be discouraged over the marks of sacrifice that it bears. Remember instead the scars of your faithful Savior. Be encouraged that this body God has given you, in all its brokenness, is perfectly designed to carry out the good works he prepared for you in advance (Eph. 2:10). The life Christ lived in his body made it possible for you to be made new—inwardly now, even as your youthful body wastes away.
One day soon, Christ will transform our lowly bodies to be like his glorious body. On that day, our bodies will put on immortality and become imperishable (1 Cor. 15). We will see him with our perfectly seeing eyes and will instantly be made like him. That’s how powerful his glory is. And yet, in that moment, we won’t be preoccupied with our own bodies. Our beauty will not impress or enthrall us. All we will be able to do is fall on our knees and worship our beautiful risen King.dies…
QUESTIONS FOR REFLECTION/ APPLICATION:
1. How does your body bear the marks of the sacrificial service of motherhood? Be specific. In what ways do these changes contrast the standard of beauty you hold for your ideal body?
2. How does reflecting on the purpose and work of Christ’s body change the way you think about your own?
3. Spend some time in prayer asking God to redeem your perspective on the purpose of your body. Name the things that you wish were different to him in prayer. Then ask him to change your heart to make you more concerned with his glory than your own.
Aylin Merck is a wife, mom of 3, writer and language learner living in the Middle East. Originally from the Dominican Republic, she has moved cross culturally many times. She is on the endlessly satisfying adventure of knowing Christ and delighting in His oneness with her. She writes and disciples others as a means of bringing them along in that journey. When she is able, she writes on her blog at worthyhope.com